At Yale, Getting Clean Was Never This Dirty
When it comes to hanky panky in the Ivy League, Yale’s got the rest of the Ancient Eight beat. Look at the evidence: compared to the rest of us with our pithy little erotica mags, they’ve got Chloe does Yale, nude calendars, Porn ‘n Chicken, Sex Week, pasty-studded screenings of mainstream porno Pirates. Their housing of Adonis-in-his-own-mind Aleksey Vayner certainly ruins their cred, but I’ve always thought of Yale as a “New Haven” for sex. (I hereby apologize for any more bad puns in this article.)
Which is why I’m more than a little surprised to read about Yale College Master Jon Holloway penning a rather prude-y missive, alerting Calhoun College dorm residents about a 90 minute sex sesh that took place in the community showers the morning before. Calhoun warns the students thusly:
“Several times since the start of the spring term some Hounies have come across a couple having the time of their lives in a shower stall. Last night the shower flooded and the bathroom could not be used for over 90 minutes. To the as yet unidentified couple, this may be pleasureable and exciting for you but it is a violation of community standards.”
I’ve gotta say, I can’t completely disagree with Calhoun here. As much as the idea of the old in-and-out in the school showers sounds hot, flooding the bathroom for your fellow students sounds about as sexy as a pap smear at Student Health. (Which is to say, not.) Fucking in plain sight of other students—also not cool. As the BDSM community is wont to say, exposing other unwilling individuals to your kink is the manners equivalent of punching Emily Post. Bottom line—in this situation, the kids screwed up their screwing.
My question, though, is this—if the Calhoun couple kept it in their stall and didn’t necessitate a plumber to clean up after them, would they still have been wrist-slapped? Do dorm officials get to go all en loco parentis on these frolicking fornicators? Yale’s a private school and can do whatever they want, but why not focus on, uh, research, instead of policing what goes on in your undergrads’ pants?
I’m sure the blogosphere will weigh in over the next few days, but I’m curious—in college and out, where and when is sex OK outside the bedroom?
Comments
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Sabrina Morgan, Feb 3, 00:21:
I think you’ve got it right when you mention not exposing other unwilling individuals. It’s great to get a thrill (and I’m no exception) from sexing it up somewhere out of the ordinary, but not at someone else’s expense. For example, if you’re, say, screwing standing up in the bathroom of your friend’s new apartment, it’s polite to wait until he’s asleep, out running an errand, or at least out of sight and earshot. Unless, of course, he’s into that…
The whole flooding the bathroom thing grosses me out on a whole ‘nother level. If they’re clogging drains, they need to clean up after themselves better. Sheesh.
Amanda, Feb 3, 14:07:
Back in the day at Smith, you had to put up a “shower hour” sign if you were going to shower with someone. Five or six years ago that went out the window, because it was deemed sexual harassment to be forced to announce when you were going to be having sex, and that somehow outweighed the other argument. Now, students are encouraged to have sex in the shower during times when the bathrooms are normally empty, but there’s still drama around it occasionally: my sophomore year (lo those many years ago), I showered with my beau one morning. We weren’t having sex at all (in fact the girl showering next to us said she heard our entire conversation), but it freaked a couple of first-years out to hear a boy-voice and a girl-voice together in the bathroom. They went to res-life and everything… Nearly caused a riot in Hubbard House!
Fortran, Feb 3, 15:39:
Hmm…you know, I never saw a sign/email/note like that at Colorado College. Then again, maybe I was just in the boring dorms.
One thing this post has shown me though? That your private stream of photos on Flickr could be interesting. I tried clickin’ on the photo and got a private warning.
team gingerbread, Feb 3, 22:20:
Personally, I thought the idea of fornicating in the shower was beyond disgusting when I lived in residence but I had many friends (most notably M, who lost her v card in a res shower and T who lost hers in a res tanning bed) who felt otherwise.
I suppose it has more to do with my germophobe status. I would feel far more uncomfortable walking in on someone beating off in a res shower than anything else.
And yes, my res did have tanning bed – they were a throwback to the 70s. We also had a steam room – which probably saw the most action from horny couples with roommates than people in need of relaxation
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